Honeymoon No Sex

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No Sex During Honeymoon

Question by venusforloveandbeauty

no sex on honeymoon

Here is the problem,

I've been with my husband for almost 5 years now and we recently married. We had a long distance relationship (Dallas, USA to Oxford, UK)for the first 4 years and we just got married 1 month ago.
Ever since we have announced our engagement and, it seems my fiance and now husband's sexual desire for me has gone out the window. I was hoping for a very romantic wedding night, but even that seemed forced. We took a very brief honeymoon, and I got very upset because we did not have sex.
I now concerned because 'SEX' has now because this very big and akward issue. I don't know what to do. i don't know how to bring it up to him, although the conversations we've had, he says that I just have a higher sex drive than him and that he's never really been a sexual person. But I just have trouble believing that. The first 1/2 of our relationship, it seemed he very much wanted me and prodded me and wanted to turn ME on to having sex. . Now, I have to sort of initiate it.
I'm struggling with this as for me part of the turn on is having the man initiate.

My question is How can I nip this in the bud before it ruins our relationship? I don't want to have marriage problems over this issue but I feel as though I'm seeing into the future and we have these major problems...I see myself getting more unhappy, feeling more insecure that my husband doesn't 'like' me and as of late, I've started to get paranoid that perhaps he is cheating on me and that is why he doesn't like me sexually. He loves cuddling and otherwise is a fantastic husband. I love him very much. How do I talk to him? Help me please.
This marriage business is soo hard! I'm willing to try anything. Is is possible for a man to lose their sex drive? Is there anything subtle I can do? Do I have to change myself?

I'd been so looking forward to have fun sex with a husband and now it is just awful as it has turned all akward:(

Answer 1 by Dr. Ashok Koparday

Re: no sex on honeymoon

Answer 2 by zaneblue

Re: no sex on honeymoon

Man, no sex on the honeymoon, unless he was at death's door, that's just not done. I don't have any suggestions for you, unfortunately.

Answer 3 by eva_m

Re: no sex on honeymoon

You have to deal with this openly.
I saw you said on another post that when you tried to talk about it with him it went from a "non-issue" to a real big issue between you. I say not bothering him about this does not make it a non-issue. It's huge. It's destroying your self-esteem, causing you to doubt his love, get paranoid.
After only ONE MONTH of marriage. How are you going to feel after a year of this? Ten years? A lifetime?

Yeah, it's going to make him uncomfortable to talk it out.
But you are supposedly equal partners, which makes your needs equal to his.
This doesn't mean he's going to change, but he does have to show he cares that you are suffering and he does need to make an effort to work with you.

You say you had a long distance relationship. Did you spend much time together physically before you married or was it mostly online or phone? You say it was a sudden change when you announced your engagement. He needs to come clean about why. If he doesn't know why, he needs to make an effort to find out. The marriage won't survive if he won't step up to the plate and show he values your happiness.

I can actually understand lackluster sex on the wedding night.
My husband and I were so exhausted from the wedding we had to make an effort not to just fall asleep.
But no sex on the honeymoon? That's extreme!

If he mislead you to that extent about his desire or ability to provide the normal physical attentions expected in a marriage, you may have grounds for annulment.

I recommend counseling.

Answer 4 by jim59105

Re: no sex on honeymoon

Bad signs this early, I would say end it now.

A long distance R for 4+ years is not the same as living together. Do you see the difference?
You are living together, that is what counts, not what you had in the llong distance R.
Most of a persons lack of interest in sex is not changable.

Unless you are willing to twist his arm for the next 40 years, and most women aren't up to that task, I say MC NOW and find out what is wrong.
I bet if you stay together, 10 years from now you will still be in the same spot but have lots more resentments. If nothing changes, would you marry hin again today.
You decide.

Lou